Two Shoes Tuesday – Regrets

Two Shoes Tuesdsay

Regret – (v) feel sad, repentant, or disappointed over (something that has happened or been done, esp. a loss or missed opportunity).

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To borrow a line from “My Way” one of Frank Sinatra’s songs, “regrets, I’ve had a few, but then again too few to mention”, I don’t think any of us can go through life without some regrets. We can regret some little things in life, or some major decisions we’ve made. We might regret something we said to a loved one in anger, and immediately regretted it. We might regret decisions or choices we’ve made, but we can not let them stand in the way of use moving on.

Personally, I do have some regrets, I’ve made some questionable decisions at times, done some things that looking back were not the best choices, but in the end, my life now might be totally different. We never know if different choices would have made our circumstances better or worse.

At one time, I might have said I regretted the choice I made in a spouse. There were major issues from the very beginning, but I honestly was in love. I made a choice, tried to stand by my man, but in the end our issues were more than I could handle. However, from that union, we have my daughter Tara. For sure, no matter the path, even if I had married someone else and  had another child, none would be just like Tara.

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When Rick passed away in 2010, we had not heard from him in years. Tara and I were also estranged from his family, a family I had one time felt very much a part of.  In the end, Rick died alone, homeless, in a field, the news article said. Talk about a few moments of regret. Had I chosen to stay with him, would he have eventually been able to fight off his addictions, or would our entire life been one big regret in the end. I did what I thought was best for my infant child at the time. No regrets, no looking back.

I’ve moved away from home twice, once to Northern Virginia, on my own, the other to Florida, with Tara. I was gone five years the first time and six the second. Both times, I have come back “home” to Pennsylvania, in fact right now, I live only one mile from the house I grew up in! I don’t regret those moves. Both times, I just felt like I needed a change. Neither time was planned too far in advance. That’s seems to be how I roll. In the end, moving back home felt right both times. I’m not saying I’ll never leave “home” again…. who knows what the future brings.

Do you have any regrets in life? How do you think you might be different if you had done something different that you now regret.

Check out other Two Shoes Tuesday posts and see what others have to say about regret or rocker.

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6 thoughts on “Two Shoes Tuesday – Regrets

  1. IntenseGuy says:

    Life takes us through some “turns and twists” and to “regret” such things is silly.

    I agree with the other commentators – this is a thoughtful (and well-written) piece.

  2. This was such a thoughtful piece of writing, Martha, and one I can relate to so very well. Except my list of poor choices would be a half-mile long! :-) It has taken me 50-plus years to grow wiser (and older, and now I’m 60 and just beginning to get it right)! Although I wonder how different my life might have turned out, I don’t regret my past in any way, beacause it has brought me here and made me who I am, and I’m ok with that! I also know me well enough that if I hadn’t made those bad choices, I would have found others just as dumb to make. I like to learn things the hard way! :-) I can also relate to dealing with the death of an ex-loved one dying, and I wish it hadn’t ended for him that way, but I also knew that I couldn’t be his salvation. It sounds to me like you’ve also reached a place where you are content with the life that you have now… and are open to new adventures… I like that very much! :-)
    Josie Two Shoes recently posted..In The PastMy Profile

  3. Ann Harrison says:

    For what ever reason, a regret that comes to the forefront in my memory banks is a night where I met up with dear old friends from my childhood. The night got a little out of hand and our relationships haven’t been the same. So sad. It totally wasn’t the outcome I expected and I wish things could be better. Oh well. I keep trying! And I don’t want to regret that night either. Learned a lot.

    Great post Martha!
    Ann Harrison recently posted..Oops! I Did It AgainMy Profile

  4. Old Egg says:

    I think probably that looking after your child is more important than your spouse. Each of us have different story to tell but your children learn so much from you that they are your number one priority.
    Old Egg recently posted..Dum makes amendsMy Profile

  5. zoe says:

    wow, that’s an incredible time line … Good to make peace with regrets…we all have them. Maturity and time give us the ability to free ourselves of them and accept them as part of the cycles of our lives…

  6. Altonian says:

    I have made several major changes in my life, all of them affecting an otherwise close-knit family. We are still close-knit, but separated. Regrets a-plenty, but without the changes I would not have the adorable grand children, and great-grand children I have; and one terrific son would be missing as well.

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